In the Beginning

Before I start talking about individual beliefs, I thought it would be good to give you all a glimpse into the story of my life thus far. We all know that our present is deeply formed and informed by our past, so I can’t rightly talk about who I am now, and what I believe now, without giving you an overview of who I once was, and the flow of life that has brought me to where I stand today. I will do my best to be brief, but, as I am writing this series as much for my own interest and introspection as yours, you will have to forgive me if I wander a touch during these first few entries.

Let’s begin.

I was born in Yorkton, Saskatchewan on October 25, 1983, to Cathay and Marty Wagantall. I was the last of three kids, with my sister Erin in the middle, and my brother Andrew as the eldest. My parents owned a lumber yard, and my dad framed and built houses. I don’t remember anything of that life, because a couple years after I was born, the lumber yard went out of business and my dad felt God’s calling on his life to enter full time ministry as a pastor. So, we packed our few belongings, and the five of us moved to Edmonton so my dad could enter school at North American Baptist College, and then Edmonton Baptist Seminary (which would eventually come to be called Taylor University College and Seminary).

Those are years I truly look back on fondly. I didn’t know it at the time, but we were, by definition, poor. We lived in low-income row housing and didn’t have money for extras, but my childhood was a happy one. There were many kids who lived in our block, and we would congregate daily on the parking pads and the playgrounds, pretending to be Ninja Turtles and listening to New Kids on the Block. If we were really lucky, on super hot days in the summer, the fire fighters would come and open the taps on the hydrants, and we would get soaking wet. I climbed trees. I scraped my knees and learned how to ride a bike.

One of my dearest memories is climbing into my dad’s lap as he worked at his tiny little desk in the master bedroom, on his tiny little Mac Classic II. I would snuggle in and encourage him to take a break from his studies. He worked so hard, and I was really proud of my daddy for going to school. And he gave the best snuggles. Sometimes when he would watch the news, he would be laying down on the couch, propped up on his arm, and I would crawl into the gap behind his legs, rest my head on his hips, and everything was right in my world. My heart still glows with warmth thinking of those young and tender years with my daddy.

With my dad in school full-time, my mom had to find work that would allow her to also be there for her three kids. Initially, she found a job doing janitorial work for my dad’s school. I don’t have many memories of that, since I was barely a toddler then, but I do have memories of her next job. My mom loved basketball and volleyball, and she single-handedly (at least to my recollection) created a vibrant sports community at the college. She was officially hired as the coach, and I had the distinct pleasure of coming with her, since I wasn’t in school full-time.

A few memories stand out for me. I remember “working out” in the tiny little weight room under the gymnasium stage and the way it smelled like stale sweat – and I felt so strong and mature, even though I’m pretty sure I just used the incline bench as a slide. I also remember coming to the games and the immense volume and spectacle of it all. Everyone treated me like I was special, and I felt like the team mascot. I also remember one of the team members giving me his deodorant because I liked the smell. I don’t think mom let me keep it though. I even got to go on a few road trips with the team for away games, and have a distinct memory of sleeping in a car bed at a church at one point.

The deepest memories for me though, are the moments of quiet darkness when I would climb up onto the stacked chairs and risers that got stored on the gym stage and get lost in my imagination. Hours would be spent there in deep and meaningful play, visiting strange worlds and completing daring quests in this “secret” place that was just for me.

I felt, and still feel, like I was the luckiest little kid in the entire world. Those years were something precious and beautiful, and I hold them in my heart with awe and gratitude.

I had no idea how difficult those years were for my parents. No knowledge of our poverty, or how physically draining it was for my mom to work and be home for all of us. Not until now, so many years later when my own family took a very similar route, do I have any ability to truly understand the sacrifices that both my parents made during those formative years of my life, and I am still in awe of how magical my young life was.

Not everything was perfect, of course. I have my share of unpleasant memories as well, but the overarching emotions I have from that period of my life, prior to my dads graduation and ordination, are contentment and joy.

And that, I think, is a good place to end this first entry. I had intended to go further, but this feels like a natural place to stop. Next I’ll talk about our families big move to begin our very first church, the deepening of my personal faith, and the beginning of my struggles with anxiety during that period.

As I had promised to touch on the current state of my Christian faith, however, let me give you this very brief summary.

While I no longer identify as an Evangelical, I am a Christian, and I do my best to follow the path that Jesus sets before me. Many of you know that Rodney and I ‘left’ the North American Baptist (NAB) denomination and have found our spiritual home with the Mennonite Church of Canada. The Anabaptist tradition of the MCC, for many reasons, resonates deeply with my soul and these shared convictions are a decent summary of my own.

Shared Convictions of Global Anabaptists

“By the grace of God, we seek to live and proclaim the good news of reconciliation in Jesus Christ. As part of the one body of Christ at all times and places, we hold the following to be central to our belief and practice:

  1. God is known to us as Father, Son and Holy Spirit, the Creator who seeks to restore fallen humanity by calling a people to be faithful in fellowship, worship, service and witness.
  2. Jesus is the Son of God. Through his life and teachings, his cross and resurrection, he showed us how to be faithful disciples, redeemed the world and offers eternal life.
  3. As a church, we are a community of those whom God’s Spirit calls to turn from sin, acknowledge Jesus Christ as Lord, receive baptism upon confession of faith, and follow Christ in life.
  4. As a faith community, we accept the Bible as our authority for faith and life, interpreting it together under Holy Spirit guidance, in the light of Jesus Christ to discern God’s will for our obedience.
  5. The Spirit of Jesus empowers us to trust God in all areas of life so we become peacemakers who renounce violence, love our enemies, seek justice and share our possessions with those in need.
  6. We gather regularly to worship, to celebrate the Lord’s Supper and to hear the Word of God in a spirit of mutual accountability.
  7. As a worldwide community of faith and life, we transcend boundaries of nationality, race, class, gender and language. We seek to live in the world without conforming to the powers of evil, witnessing to God’s grace by serving others, caring for creation and inviting all people to know Jesus Christ as Saviour and Lord.

In these convictions we draw inspiration from Anabaptist forebears of the 16th century, who modelled radical discipleship to Jesus Christ. We seek to walk in his name by the power of the Holy Spirit, as we confidently await Christ’s return and the final fulfillment of God’s kingdom.”

(“Shared Convictions” copied from https://mwc-cmm.org/en/resources/shared-convictions-poster-2022 on February 10, 2023)